How many times have you forced yourself to change to fit in?
How many times have you looked for acceptance by others?
How many times have you felt lonely no matter how many people surround you?
How many times have you broken yourself into pieces to make someone else whole?
How many times have you ended up your day asking yourself “who really am I?”
A relationship of any kind is a two-way street. You can’t stay in love with a person who always expects you to be someone else. You can’t work for a company where its orientations and policies are completely opposite to your values and beliefs. You can’t hang out with people who always put their needs ahead yours.
In case you forgot, let me remind you of the fact that the people, whom you surround yourself with, have a huge impact on your live. Some people benefit you, lift you up, accept you for who you are, inspire you to reveal the giant you, believe that you can fly and shine, whereas some other ones may take advantage of you, pull you down and make you feel like you were worth nothing.
If you see yourself struggling to fit in or feeling uncomfortable in a relationship or a circle, it’s time to scan through the reasons why you chose to be in there and if they reciprocate. Stop being worried about belonging, but genuine happiness because darling, you deserve to be welcomed, not just be allowed to be in any relationship.
It’s true that you cannot always control who shows up your life. Yet, you have a super power to decide who stays and who leaves. It’s called CHOICE. You don’t just hang out with someone, you choose to hang out with them, spend time investing in them, be around them and let them be around you. You can avoid being in miserable relationships when you decide to be with someone who
- Accepts you for who you are – both the good & the bad you
- Appreciates your presence in their lives
- Allows you to make decisions on your own and support you no matter what
- Makes you feel safe
- Encourages you to jump out of your comfort zone
- Believes in you even when you don’t believe in yourself
- Makes time for you
- Treats you with integrity and respect
- Tells you truths which are helpful rather than discouraging
“Get in where you fit it and go on to shine!”
To some people, you’ll never be enough, either too much or too little. And it’s just Okay. They are just not your right ones. To have the right people in your life, make sure you clean the space for them to come and stay.
Once you start choosing people who choose you, your life will blossom and flourish in a myriad of ways.